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The Sunday Pews

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Church Meetings

Sac. Mtg. Speaker Tests Bishop’s Patience With Slew of Alternative Swear Words

PRESTON, Idaho — "I read the fetchin' Book of Mormon, and dang it all to heck, it's freakin' true."

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Parents Accused of Quickly Writing Forgetful Son’s Talk Early Sunday Morning

SCRANTON, Penn. - A local emeritus deacon's quorum president is accused of having forgotten his assignment to speak in church today, allegedly resulting in a quickly written talk by one of his parents this morning, sources say.

Local Brother “Wasn’t Planning on Bearing His Testimony Today”

While members agree that it’s not their place to judge, they say their exasperation fell under the category of righteous judgement as the brother read the words “I wasn’t planning on bearing my testimony today” from a printed sheet of paper he took from his pocket at the pulpit.

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