The Hill family and the George family, who are neighbors, are tailgating the event a full week in advance. They pass the time “taking Jello shots” and blasting the Mormon Tabernacle Choir’s greatest hits through their minivan sound systems.
“It’s a nightmare of biblical proportions. Traffic, early-morning noise, chaos and destruction everywhere. Send the flies. Send the frogs. Send the Jehovah’s Witnesses for all I care – anything but construction. My testimony just can’t handle it.”
SALT LAKE CITY – In an unexpected move that has sent shockwaves throughout the general membership of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, LDSLeaks has publicized classified information regarding the Brethren’s favorite dental hygiene paste.
BOISE, Idaho – After a comprehensive search of the greater Boise area that began almost two weeks ago, authorities say they have found 32-year-old Sister Rebecca Todd alive and well in an abandoned potato field.